Kaden
This morning I woke my little man up and he crawled up on my lap buried his face in my neck and didn't want to move. (He's been mad at me for days now cause I been slacking He doesn't understand Mommy being to sick to pamper his per his usual standards)
I didn't want to put him down because Kaden's hugs are therapeutic. They can just melt the tension out of your body. Kaden's affection is the most honest and real love. He doesn't put anything on he just acts how he feels and this morning he was loving me a whole lot.
I remember when Kaden was born it will be 13 years in April. I still can't believe it has been that long.
When they laid him in my arms he wrinkled his little face up and just screamed for the longest. He looked like a broken little bird his bent little legs and hazy eyes. When I put my cheek to his though he instantly stopped crying.
I remember making deals with him. Like Kaden I promise to never give up on you if you promise not to give up on me.
I felt like many times Kaden deserved a better Mommy.
I felt many times that the best I had in me wasn't good enough.
Kaden made me fight harder to be more.
He brought out a toughness in me I didn't know was there.
One day it hit me that I was the perfect Mother for Kaden and he was the perfect son for me. We kind of "started off" together. My life begin the day he was born.
Everything I thought I knew about life was obsolete and everything I had become was the result of having and loving Kaden.
Kaden is woven into my very soul. Everything I think and feel begins and ends with him.
Imagine the simplicity. Imagine being in a moment that nothing distracts from. Kaden is a "feeler" Being deaf and blind his other senses seem way more in tune and when he connects with you it's a powerful thing because it's so centered and pure.
There is something about Holding him that takes you to a spiritual place.
I Hold him and feel this oneness with God and the universe. I feel like I know a secret most people will never understand.
I wouldn't change my little man not for anything.
What society might see as preferable. What people may see as disadvantages when you really see Kaden you start to wonder about the things that are missing inside of you. Does that extra chromosome give you this ability to feel stronger. Make your laugh deeper. Let you really FEEL what it means to be alive. Does it let you slow down in a world where everything is rushed. Does it take away the barriers to being authentic. It just makes sense when you know Kaden to think he is evolved beyond typical understanding that he exists on this higher plane of being. I never fail to be in awe of the magic of this tiny precious boy.
I didn't want to put him down because Kaden's hugs are therapeutic. They can just melt the tension out of your body. Kaden's affection is the most honest and real love. He doesn't put anything on he just acts how he feels and this morning he was loving me a whole lot.
I remember when Kaden was born it will be 13 years in April. I still can't believe it has been that long.
When they laid him in my arms he wrinkled his little face up and just screamed for the longest. He looked like a broken little bird his bent little legs and hazy eyes. When I put my cheek to his though he instantly stopped crying.
I remember making deals with him. Like Kaden I promise to never give up on you if you promise not to give up on me.
I felt like many times Kaden deserved a better Mommy.
I felt many times that the best I had in me wasn't good enough.
Kaden made me fight harder to be more.
He brought out a toughness in me I didn't know was there.
One day it hit me that I was the perfect Mother for Kaden and he was the perfect son for me. We kind of "started off" together. My life begin the day he was born.
Everything I thought I knew about life was obsolete and everything I had become was the result of having and loving Kaden.
Kaden is woven into my very soul. Everything I think and feel begins and ends with him.
Imagine the simplicity. Imagine being in a moment that nothing distracts from. Kaden is a "feeler" Being deaf and blind his other senses seem way more in tune and when he connects with you it's a powerful thing because it's so centered and pure.
There is something about Holding him that takes you to a spiritual place.
I Hold him and feel this oneness with God and the universe. I feel like I know a secret most people will never understand.
I wouldn't change my little man not for anything.
What society might see as preferable. What people may see as disadvantages when you really see Kaden you start to wonder about the things that are missing inside of you. Does that extra chromosome give you this ability to feel stronger. Make your laugh deeper. Let you really FEEL what it means to be alive. Does it let you slow down in a world where everything is rushed. Does it take away the barriers to being authentic. It just makes sense when you know Kaden to think he is evolved beyond typical understanding that he exists on this higher plane of being. I never fail to be in awe of the magic of this tiny precious boy.
posted by ~*Radonna*~ at 2:22 PM
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